Monday, 27 June 2011

Am I an old fuddy duddy?

Even writing fuddy duddy makes feel feel old and …older.

Maybe times have changed a lot since Mr E and I hooked up over 17 years ago or maybe it’s just that my thoughts on this are completely different to OMG I can;t believe I’m typing this the younger generation. Wow, typing the younger generation makes me feel like a fuddy duddy as well.  So maybe I am one.

The scenario is:

A couple have been in a relationship for a few years.  They break up as one partner basically wants more freedom (think move interstate, travel, change jobs every 3 months, those kind of things).  They have property together.  They decide to sell the property but until they do  they continue to share the property. That they are remaining friends and there is a spare bedroom.

This is where I feel odd about the whole thing.  The now former couple are still sharing the same room.  In fact, still sleeping together in the same bed.  Now I get the whole friends with benefits (FWB) scenario.  Hell, it sounds like a great deal if you can keep your emotions separated (which I couldn't) and no one gets hurt (which I would – because I’m a sucker like that!) BUT according to the one party I have spoken to in this, it’s not a friends with benefits scenario.

Apparently it’s more like this:

Image from

Why?  There is a spare room, a spare place to sleep.  I just don’t get it.

See for me – if someone had basically said you are the millstone hanging around my neck stopping me from enjoying my youth (okay major poetic license there), after the tears and the anger and the more tears I think I would barely be able to be civil.  Let alone share a bedroom.

Now if I was the dumper in this case, if you were dumb morose enough to still want to sleep in the same bed with me, I’d be happy to cop a feel all night, every night. I guess I won’t care about the dumpees feeling at all.

FWB I can cope with. Basically giving away your self esteem for human touch makes me wonder how much self esteem you had in the first place.

Um… I’m very Judgy McJudge Judge this morning aren't i?  Can someone explain this in plain English to me?  Because all I can see is two people getting hurt more than they currently are.


Sarah Mac said...

I think you've basically got it covered.

If you tattoo doormat on your forehead you can't really get too upset when people walk all over you.

I say, move into the spare room. Better still, get them to, preserve your dignity and self respect.

E. said...

Sarah - Thanks for commenting. I do really worry about this persons self esteem. The the doormat part of your comment was so apt.


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