We had travelled to an Eisteddfod to see Boy Child perform in a dance troupe. They performed in the open age section and came third out of 13 acts in that section. We were so proud of him. He was only 12 and the youngest in the troupe. He was also the only boy.
The girls he danced with last year have been to the Eistedfodd again. I'm not sure of their results (Highly Commended i think) but I know they had fun.
In September, Boy Child missed the second Eistedfodd he was due to dance in as we were coming home from New Zealand. This time the troupe won and it was without him. There were only 3 acts in that section. Not that it would have made any difference. Boy decided the troupe didn't need him and that seems to have been the beginning of the end. Less than a month later we were told by medical professionals that he had to quit.
The stress of performing teamed with starting High School caused a whole slew of issues. Looking back if I hadn't gotten my headache, things would have been different. I would have noticed that he wasn't coping very well and that he was very worried about me. Well, at least I hope I would have.
So he quit dancing. We bought the end of year dance concert DVD because Girl Child is in it. But my heart hurts when I hear the song that he performed too in the Eistedfodd. It's the first one on the DVD and it makes me feel sad.
Girl Child watched the DVD a few weeks ago. I forgot how much this DVD affects me. I have trouble watching it. It's not the dancing itself but the fact that Boy Child was supposed to be on it and he is not. The first dance of the DVD, the one missing my boy, it makes me cry.
I've had a version of this post sitting around since March. I thought I would post it and then move on from the angsty, whiny stuff I've been writing lately.